"I am" is the shortest sentence in English. Is 'I do' the longest?
"No comment" is a comment.
(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer.
24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case. Hmmmm...
640K ought to be enough for anybody. -Bill Gates, 1981.
A .GIF is worth a thousand .TXT.
A Meteor is an example of a rock star.
A Mystic asking for a hot-dog: "Make me one with everything"
A PC a day keeps the Apple away!
A SQL query walks into a bar and sees two tables. Asks: 'Can I join you?'
A Scarf is just an unfinished Afghan
A Skydiver is taken by the gravity of his situation.
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere
A book in the hand is worth two on the shelf!
A book misplaced is a book lost
A house is a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff
A penny saved is not very much
A program is used to turn data into error messages.
A social life? Where can I download that!?
A truly wise man never argues with a Unicorn
APPLE: It may be slow, but at least it's expensive.
ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.
Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking about
As I said before, I never repeat myself
As a matter of fact, it IS a banana in my pocket!
BREAKFAST.COM Halted... Cereal port not responding.
Back up my hard drive? I can't find the reverse switch!
Classic: A book which people praise but don't read. - Mark Twain
Computers all wait at the same speed!
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
Condense soup, not books!
Confucius say: "Its stuffy inside fortune cookie"
Confucius say: "Man who runs behind car gets exhausted"
Consultant: A person who makes good on a salesman's promises!
DOS=HIGH?  I knew it was on something...
Do device drivers need a chauffeur's license?
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Documentation: The worst part of programming.
Don't diet, download a virus to remove the FAT.
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
Enter any 12-digit prime number to continue.
Error 3032 - Recursion error. See error 3032.
Error, no Keyboard - Press F1 to Continue.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Everyone is entitled to my opinion!
Everyone smiles in the same language.
Evil triumphs when good people do nothing. - Einstein
Fer sell cheep: BBS spel chekker. Wurks grate.
Great minds think alike; small minds run together
Hard work never killed anyone but why take a risk?
Help! I can't find the "ANY" key.
Honk if you love peace and quiet!
How do I set my laser printer to stun?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
I am NOT a tagline THIEF. I am a tagline CONSERVATIONIST.
I don't have the time for a hobby. I have a computer.
I have a really good memory, except it's short.
I know a good tagline when I steal one!
I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.
I think I am, therefore, I am... I think.
I wish life had a scroll-back buffer.
I'd love to help you out.  Which way did you come in?
I'm not a complete idiot... Several parts are missing!
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
If at first you don't succeed, blame your parents!
If you can't make it good, make it LOOK good. -Bill Gates.
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
Intelligence tests are biased toward the literate.
Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
It said "insert disk #3", but only two will fit...
Just another prisoner of gravity!
Kids: They're not sleeping, they're recharging!
Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your trip in kilometers
Light year: 1/3 less calories than your regular year
Live every day as though it were your last. One day, you'll be right
Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce
Message encrypted: Press ALT-F4 to read encoded message
Multitasking: Reading in the bathroom
My reality check just bounced
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features...
My tagline could eat your tagline for breakfast
Next time you wave at me, use more than one finger!
Nine times out of ten the statisticians are wrong
No honey, I can't eat with the family. My computer gets lonely!
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
Old computers make great boat anchors
Old musicians never die. They just decompose!
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Operator, give me the number for 911
Origin of Life? Just check my refrigerator...
Oxymoron: Race walking
Press SPACEBAR once to abort, or twice to save changes
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives
Read messages, not taglines
Real Programmers balance their checkbooks in hex
Redundant book title: DOS For Dummies
Reward for a job well done: More work
Running Windows is better than washing them!
Shortcut: longest distance between two points
Some people have no idea what they're doing, and are really good at it!
System halted - Press all keys at once to continue
THE fIRST sTEP iS tO tAKE oFF tHE cAPS lOCK
Tech support is just a busy signal away
That's not a bug, it's an undocumented feature
The caterpillar does all the work but the butterfly gets all the publicity
The dog ate my .REP packet
The only place I want data loss is on my credit card!
The person who snores the loudest will fall asleep first
The reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where the bad girls live
The seminar on time travel will be held two weeks ago
The shortest distance between two points is under construction
There are three kinds of people: Those who can count, and those who can't
There are two types of people; those who finish what they start and
There is an exception to every rule, except this one.
There will be a rain dance Friday night, weather permitting!
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past
They say there's always one weirdo on the bus, but I couldn't find them!
This virus requires Microsoft Windows 3.x
Top secret! Burn before reading!
Unzip... expand... What kind of pervert came up with this?
User Error: Replace user and hit any key to continue...
Users come in two types: Those who have lost data, and those who will.
WOMAN.ZIP - Great program but no documentation
We all live in a yellow subroutine...
What do you mean, QWK? It took me over an hour to read!
What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
When all else fails, read the instructions
When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
You can learn many things from children... like how much patience you have
Youth is glorious, but it isn't a career
